Ostentatious rednecks in their souped up little cars
Long live the confederation they all live in bars

Dirty yards
Guys named Floyd
Down in the Armpit

Bloody game is hanging up in big old Ed's back yard
Martys climbing up his roof he partied much too hard
Your mother is your sister and your brother is your Aunt

Screamin monkies left and right
Raising ruckus day and night
Down in the Armpit

Beer and smoke beer and smoke
lots of rednecks beer and smoke
Beer and smoke beer and smoke
lots of rednecks beer and smoke

Beat your kids and rape your cats
with dirty nasty fishing hats
Parkway village is mighty fine
ifn you like NASCAR and sippin' cheap wine
Picklemans sneezing in his jar
a buck on his truck don't go to far
Lee's won't sell me cigaretts or
magazines with women's breasts

Down in the Armpit (YEE-HAAA)

Friday to Sunday Just watch Ed's House
Just clean the dishes and you'll make 50 bucks.
John hung up the phone and packed his sack
He sat at the table and had pizza for a snack.
He said to his friend its not a bad deal
Just as he was finishing his meal.

Darkness came early
The floor creaked silently
The next moments passed very violently
So terrified John could hardly see

The intruder was sprawled out in splattered blood
He had to call the cops because it wasn't his fault.
Instead he dragged him down stairs fainted then collapsed
The intruder then vanished in the time that had elapsed.
I need to escape from reality
Got some weed in a little baggie
I can't get high all alone
I'll call around to see who else is home

All of Saturday passed in a daze
So high he seemed to be in a maze.
The next morning things seemed fine
He ran to the house and got there just in time.
Wiped up the blood threw the towel away
Collected his money and said have a nice day.
State Trooper pulled up and put him in cuffs
I didn't mean to kill him he broke into the house.
Arresting a murderer gets me promoted to the top
And I only brought you in because I smelled POT.

The fruit was on the floor in a pile of some hay
Jeremiah scratched his beard when he heard a horse's neigh
In the fourty years he'd done this job he'd never heard a sound
That could probably explain why these riddles are abound

Aunt sally had to cook so the family wouldn't starve
Uncle Gene had to hunt so they had some hearty meat
Billy bob had to farm so he grew up big and strong
But it was Jeremiahs job to guard the rhubarb But he never knew quite why why why
But he never knew quite why

As he sat there by himself he sang a little note
Then he lit a cigarette and he had himself a smoke
He waited and he waited and he waited a little more
Just like he'd been doing for the fourty years before.

"I'm gonna go to sleep" he thought to himself.
"I don't wanna sit here and play with myself"
So he put his gun aside and he tipped his wide-brimmed hat
And began to drift off in a little peaceful nap

Aunt sally had to cook so the family wouldn't starve
Uncle Gene had to hunt so they had some hearty meat
Billy bob had to farm so he grew up big and strong
But it was Jeremiahs job to guard the rhubarb

But he never knew quite why why why
But he never knew quite why

He awoke with a start when he heard the piercing clatter
Then he grabbed his gun and looked around the cheese was getting fatter
He heard a sound from the yard listened and looked down
The rhubarb he'd been watching was no longer on the ground

He stepped out of the barn in the hopes to find a thief
Then he saw a strange sight which defied belief
A dozen little rhubarb men were standing in the yard
Carrying off the secret fruit which he was meant to guard

As the little fruit moved closer jeremiah did the same
The shotgun he loaded primed lifted and took aim
As the trespassers turned around there was a loud KABLAMM!!!
Jeremiah smiled and looked around he'd made some rhubarb jam.

The next mornin jeremiah hung his gun on the wall
In remembrance of the rhubarb men and the day he killed them all
Aunt sally took the excess fruit and put it in a pie
For jeremiah to sit and watch till the day he died

And now he found out why why why
And now he found out why why why

I like my cheese and like my beef
I also like to compliment you
Kissing ass is half my name
The other half is manipulating you

The boys out at junction thirty-two
Could probably be shining their boots for you
Instead you'd rather take a ride
At my side
In my Caravan

I sing so slow that it is hard
To understand what words im using
This part's probably really annoying
I think i try to hard to be amusing

My camels ready and my turbans tight
The sand blows up and hits my face
I think i'll go and blaze tonight
Down at my boy abdul's place

Die Jungen von meine schwule kasehaus
Are probably feeding your snake for you
Duke Ellington would have kicked my ass
If he'd ever gotten to hear
Our fucked up Caravan

CARAVAN
CARAVAN
CARAVAN

IMMUNE
IMMUNE
IMMUNE
IMMUNE

A couple years after that, in the second grade, I was being chased by a bully. I was and still am a really big nerd, so I had to get away by any means necessary. I cut through a yard and got cut by a rusty fence. I wasn't worried about an infection because when I was three, I became IMMUNE

IMMUNE
IMMUNE
IMMUNE
IMMUNE

One day I was walking along and playing with a knickerbocker. I was all decked out in snap bracelets as all fourth graders were. Then I dropped the knickerbocker. I bent over to pick them up and a dog came from behind me ad bit me right square in my big fat arm. It was foaming at the mouth but I had no fear because I knew I was IMMUNE

IMMUNE
IMMUNE
IMMUNE
IMMUNE

taking